I could talk all day

Got waken up by YH at 836am to go exercise. At first I thought that he was really disciplined. Turns out he didn’t sleep at all. Cheater. Didn’t sleep cos the whole night he was, I quote, "talking to his gf". Ahem. I haven’t talked to anyone for a long time.

Anyway, we went to the gym. Ffffffffffucking siong man. I think the years of neglect on my body is beginning to show. Either that or YH is damn strong. He matched me load for load all the way while doing the chest press. Amazing. Amazement quickly turned into jealousy. He’s like 30 over kg lighter than me (I'm 102.5kg now!) but carrying the same weight as me. But his people skills showed when he assumed for me that I have been doing too many push-ups in the days before. Biting the bait, I agreed with him, whole-heartedly. Maybe I shouldn’t do so many push-ups when I have a gym session the following day.

Well anyway the gym session soon turned boring for me when I realized I had fully failed my chest and arm muscles. I didn’t want to train anymore of my legs, cos my thighs are like 25 inches thick already. Yes, 25 inches. Each. OH!! Suddenly I realize why I attract more fleshy ladies! They look so small and petite beside me! Hmm… maybe I should go Expressions next time to pick up ladies.. economical some more… but then again I digress.
Where was I? Oh yah 25 inches thighs. Well it got pretty boring for me cos inside I was really looking forward to go swim or jog. I think I need to kill this idea cos going to the gym is something that I SHOULD do if I wanna get back my physique. I should kill this disease. Ok I commit to myself now. Treat every gym session seriously.

Then came the best part. Swimming! I think I like to swim because I’m proud to be able to swim. I learnt everything from scratch, no teachers or coaches. I learnt it when I was going out with YX. Because she loved to swim, and always got sian-ed by perverts while she was at the pool, I picked up swimming so that I could accompany her. But I learnt it the hard way hahaha… I used to go under water with my goggles on and observe how other people swim. Then slowly change my style to what it is now. Of course I had a little help from Kenny, he was the ‘swim with seh’ consultant back then.
For my calculation purposes, I treat one lap of the pool as 50m. I swam 40 today. Wah 2km man. After gym somemore. Triathlete in the making. Anyway YH got my disease and stayed out of the pool.

After lunch, like 2 sneaky little girls, YH and I started to talk about the birds and the bees. Haha that is all I can say.

Well then KW, my manager called. He is really a fucking cheebye. He demands to know my whereabouts ALL the time. I think I shall give him the honour of a brand new post. About KW the cheebye. His name rhymes with cheebye.
Oh how foul can your language get BigBang? Well after I learn how to post videos here I will share how I got this extensive range of vocabulary. Stay tuned.

Beer belly

After going for badminton and jogging with YH on Thursday, I went swimming alone. For the record, it was 2 years since I played badminton, 7 months since I last jogged, and about 15 months since I last swimmed. I'm amazed myself. Both with the length of time that I haven't been exercising, and with my stamina (or what's left of it). I feel like a triathalete man hahahahahha.

Let me share some history..

Badminton.
My first experience with badminton was when I was very young, maybe 4 or 5. My mum used to bring me back to Malaysia to visit my late grandmother and I loved it cos I had cousins around my age to play with. She bought 4 tiny wooden rackets for kids and it came with a plastic shuttlecock, and I was really thrilled over it. I've heard of players like Yang Yang and Zhao Jian Hua at that time from my dad and the TV and I guess I was excited to learn it.
My grandma's place is those kampong type with lots of free space to run around. And so one evening I was playing with my cousin (We called him Ah Ya as in Ah Duck). I guess both of us are fast learners, after a while we were so good he was Yang Yang and I was Zhao Jian Hua. That is until the pesky adults decided to step in. My mum, the SEA games gold medalist, told Ah Ya and I to team up and play against her. I guess I still haven't learnt the beauty of teamwork at that time. The first ball that she served was to Ah Ya. Guess what happened? Being the competitor that I am, I ran blindly into the path of Ah Ya towards the shuttlecock and *POK* his racket hit me in the nose. Chee bye. I got a bloody nose straight away. That's why I don't have Andy Lau's nose now.

Ah Ya and I are still buddies.

In primary school I joined the badminton team. And because of the aggression with which I smashed at that time, my height, and my lack of speed, the coach put me into doubles. My partner was a good friend of mine, and his name is Yuanxin. I must say our school team was pretty good. I remember that the 1st Single guy was damn solid. He was the coach's pet as well but then again no one really wanted to be his pet at that time. That coach was a fucking monster with a bad temper to go with. He was my chinese teacher in primary 2 and he once broke the wooden 1 metre ruler while whacking me. But that's another story. The 2nd single and 3rd single guys I forgot, but i remember Yuanxin and I played 1st Doubles. We were fucking good. Against Fuhua Primary, Yuanxin smashed and the shuttlecock hit that little fucker's mouth and he bled. We won. Power right? We were a super team. Needless to say, our school won the Bukit Timah district champion.

When I went to RV, I naturally went into the badminton team. I wanted to join basketball but I didn't really know how to play at that time. So badminton it was. And NCC also.
Being in the badminton team in RV was damn sian. The captain was a total chee bye. I think he wanted to join NCC but was rejected for not being man enough, which was why he came to badminton and tekan the team like what the NCC does. Sadly for me, no matter where I went it was pure tekan. NCC and badminton. Siong. Somemore the trainings were held inside the hall, so nobody could see what that idiot was up to. He was Hitler.
I think my passion for badminton died then, partly because of the senseless trainings, and also from playing basketball everyday before school. And because I was not too lousy in basketball by the end of sec one, and the basketball team was lacking in one big guy for center, I got approached by the captain of the bball team.
I can still remember it was a Saturday, and we were having a water break during the badminton training. The bball captain Guoqiang came and asked me, "Eh you wanna join the basketball team?"
I said "Yeah!"
"Then come down for training now lah"

And with that, I went up to the hall and quit badminton. How my life changed because of this.

That's all for now. I'm feeling so damed hungry and I can smell my mum's Bak Kut Teh... yummy.

Afterglow

And so it happened. After reading and laughing so many blogs, I finally got into blogging. It's like having sex for the first time after watching so much porn. Friends tell me that it's fun, it won't hurt, it's cool, it's in and such, and I finally tried it for the FIRST time. Pretty cool I must say. That tingling feeling. I'm going to shout it to the world that I have a blog tomorrow. Yeah like what guys do after they do it for the first time. Blog and tell. But my keyboard is making so much noise when I press on the spacebar. I don't wanna wake anyone up with my blogging. The feeling is like you putting a pillow over the girl's face to prevent the rest of the family from hearing her squealing like a pig. Get the idea? No? You should stop wanking.

I have to get a new keyboard if I really wanna blog.

Meanwhile I shall indulge in this new blog of mine. Explore every inch. Maximise it to my greatest fulfillment. Yeah.

Thanks to YH the man. He told me blogging is fun. And so I read his blog and started my own. Yikes. From what I said earlier, it sounds almost disgusting.

Till next time!

Virginal post

Wow i feel like a virgin!